“We love because he first loved us.”  (1 John 4:19)

As a child in elementary school, I can remember the tedious task of going through the purchased package of valentines to be distributed at the holiday party.  On each of the cards containing characters such as animals and cowboys, there would be printed sayings.  For instance, “You’ve got me hooked” might appear next to the image of a pirate, and usually the accompanying catchphrase “Be My Valentine” would be ever-present. There were cards that were more appropriate for girls than boys and, of course, ones that expressed more affection than others which you saved for your friends.  The left-over valentines that were more neutral or didn’t say a lot were the ones you ended up giving to the children you didn’t care for all that much.  Amazing how even in those younger years, we learned to hand out love in degrees. For, “when I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child” (1 Corinthians 13:11a).

Obviously, as grown-ups we wouldn’t think of acting like that for “when I became a man, I put childish ways behind me” (1 Corinthians 13: 11b). Or so we would like to think.  But we know it’s truly not the case, if we’re honest with ourselves.  Sometimes we adults withhold or withdraw our love with intention and don’t always do a good job fixing the fallout when we do so. I recently heard the story that on a snowy February day, a lady looked out her window.  A tear came to her eye as she saw one of her neighbors clearing her walkway with his snow blower. Although over time they had been in and out of each other’s homes, in the recent past there had been a perceived conflict with this family . . . life stuff that you are not so sure whether the feelings are real or imagined. She was surprised to see the neighbor doing such a kind deed and was humbled. Perhaps it was his way of saying that whatever had transpired was in the past or maybe no longer mattered. “When someone is going through a storm, your silent presence is more powerful than a million empty words” (Maria Rivera).  And so it was that her heart was warmed on this cold day.

If we could get this ‘love thing’ right, many of the solutions to the rest of life’s problems would fall into place.  Jesus said, ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment.  And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself’ ” (Matthew 22:37-39).  How can we possibly withhold love for our neighbor when just like us – they are God’s kids too.  Now that we have put away childish ways, we must save the best of the valentines for all of God’s children.  After all – it was He who first loved us.

REFLECTION:  As you interact with others in the upcoming week, pay attention to the varying degrees of friendliness you offer.  In those cases where you determine your affection might not be pleasing to God, think about what underlying factors are contributing to those feelings.  What dynamics can you work on or pray about so that you ultimately develop a relationship that would fulfill His commandment?

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